What exactly is Childism?
In short it’s about the discrimination of children in our society. It’s about the fact that child rights should be human rights, and yet children are treated in ways we would never imagine treating an adult.
- Why is it still legal in England to hit children in the name of discipline, when if you hit an adult you could be arrested?
- Why is it OK to place children in solitary confinement at school if they misbehave, when the only adults who receive the same treatment are in prison?
- Why is it OK to make holes in children’s bodies, without their consent because adults find it cosmetically pleasing?
- Why is it OK to leave vulnerable babies crying alone at night, when if vulnerable adults were treated the same way there would be uproar?
- Why is it OK to share photos of children in dysregulated and vulnerable emotional states online in the name of adult entertainment?
- Why can’t children vote at the same age they are allowed to gain legal employment and pay income tax? (Especially when voting decisions will affect them for far longer than the adults who choose for them?)
- Why are the childcare and education systems so chronically underfunded? When the economic decisions made by our politicians have a direct, negative, impact on children’s lives?
These are just a tiny handful of questions illustrating examples of childism in our society today. Childism runs deep through every single element of our lives, yet it is rarely spoken about.
Childism is also a feminist issue. Why? Because the bulk of childcare traditionally defaults to women, whether that’s mothers or childcare workers. It is women who are judged for their motherhood skills (how many articles have you read about ‘dad guilt’?) and women whose identity is divided into mother V not a mother as soon as they hit their thirties. Dads who work are simply called ‘dads’. Mums who work are called ‘working mums’, as if the default for women SHOULD be to stay at home with their children.
Care of all types is heavily staffed by women. Similarly Care of all types is chronically underfunded and under appreciated. It is considered a ‘lesser’ occupation by society, one for those who are unable to achieve more and thus do not make an informed choice to BE a carer. Childcare in particular is full of discrimination, stereotyping and a clear disregard for the importance of the job (what could be more important than raising children?!). Childcare practitioners are highly qualified and yet paid minimum wage.
Childcare workers are one of the most underpaid and under appreciated of all professions, with governments giving them lemonade funding and expecting champagne care. There is no coincidence here. A role that is heavily staffed by women, providing care to children is open to discrimination of both women AND children. Frankly, we need to appreciate our care workers more, pay them more and fund them more and change the narrative from unskilled, to highly educated. It’s time to break the cycle of childism and the discrimination it inserts its murky tendrils into.
Childism is also about adult mental health. Why? Because it is the very root of most adult mental health issues today, because it has affected every single adult. Childism must become a central core of all discussions about mental health. We must recognise the discrimination we have ALL faced as children and how this shapes us. As children we all suffered a lack of dignity, a lack of autonomy, a lack of trust and a lack of respect, whether we’re aware of it or not.
The actions and beliefs of a childist society have direct implications on our health and well-being throughout childhood and beyond. Many of the emotional and relational struggles we experience as adults can be traced back to Childist roots. Becoming anti-childist is not just about making a change to improve the lives of children, it is about changing the lives of every single person on this planet. Breaking the cycle of discrimination of children will have a HUGE impact on adult mental health, so why is it not spoken about by all mental health charities, politicians and health professionals?
Childism needs to be the next big ‘ism’ we speak about in society, because it is the key to making our world a more equitable, healthy, understanding and accepting place.
My new book ‘Because I Said So – Why society is childist and how breaking the cycle of discrimination of children can change the world’ publishes soon. It’s a call to arms, for people to understand themselves, their parents, the society in which we live and the impact we all have on children. The book is a rallying cry to stand together to fight for our children today, and a gentle support to help you to understand how your past has impacted you. It will help to heal family disagreements and break generational cycles of trauma.
It will make you angry (especially the chapter about politics).
It will make you sad…
….but it will also open your eyes and fill you with the knowledge and passion needed to draw a line under the childism that affects every element of a child’s life; from their schooling, privacy, SEND and mental health support to considerations of their privacy, issues of consent and the plans of world governments to change the structure of society, with children and families (and those who support them) as the biggest losers.
‘Because I Said So!’ is my fourteenth book and I feel like all books I’ve written have brought me to this point. this is the WHY behind gentle parenting. Child rights are human rights, but until now I don’t believe they have been adequately discussed in a way that is accessible to the general public. It’s time to change that.
‘Because I Said So” is out in September. Click HERE to preorder a copy and come and join the anti-childist revolution!
Sarah Ockwell-Smith 
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