“Gentle parenting is so hard, I’m not sure I’m cut out for it!” If I had a pound/dollar/euro for everytime I’ve seen this written online I would be a VERY rich woman by now. However it is totally and uttlerly WRONG. This sentence makes me incredibly sad and frustrated because it highlights how much peopleContinue reading “Gentle Parenting is hard, doesn’t work, and makes parents feel bad!”
Author Archives: SarahOckwell-Smith
No, it’s not their hormones! The real reason parents struggle with teen behaviour (and what to do about it).
“It’s their hormones!” If you raise a concern about your young person in a group of other parents, I can guarantee that within a minute talk will turn to hormones. If your young person is male, any difficulties you have will be blamed on the fact that their body is “swimming in testosterone”; if theyContinue reading “No, it’s not their hormones! The real reason parents struggle with teen behaviour (and what to do about it).”
The last Christmas toy – why the festive season hits different when you have teenagers
The following is a short excerpt from my new book ‘How to Raise a Teen‘: Have you ever thought about the last time you did something with your young person (YP)? When they are little, we commemorate their firsts; first steps, first words, first solid food, their first pair of shoes and the first timeContinue reading “The last Christmas toy – why the festive season hits different when you have teenagers”
Ten important takeaways from ‘Because I Said So! why society is Childist and how breaking the cycle of discrimination towards children can change the world’
We have all been affected by childism when we were children, we often don’t realise it though and just grew to accept that adults hold a position of power over children. Often our loved ones have been even more deeply affected than us and when we struggle with their beliefs about parenting and discipline, we have to start with empathy and understanding how they have reached this position before we can ever try to change it.
Why I’m Fighting Childism and Championing Gentle Parenting – my story
I grew angry at the messages so prevalent in society which led me to try to raise my son in a way that felt instinctively wrong to both me and him. However, these experiences also planted a seed – one that would take a further five years to begin to sprout and another two decades to come to fruition. They became the fuel behind my desire to raise awareness of the way society discriminates against children and their needs in an attempt to prioritise the wants and wishes of adults.
Why ‘the youth of today’ are actually better behaved than ever (despite their harsh parenting)
The truth is – the youth of today are some of the best behaved in history – despite their parenting still very much focusing on harsh, outdated, authoritarian approaches, the adults of today just have trouble remembering and viewing the world without the discrimination with which they themselves were raised as a child.
Why we need more politicians who are mothers
How do we bring humanity to politics? How do we nurture families and quite rightfully view children as the society of tomorrow? The answer is simple – we move from the patriarchy to the matriarchy. We give the reins of power to women, or more specifically – mothers. Mothers who deeply care about the world they are shaping for their children. Mothers who have empathy for others and don’t view those less fortunate as a drain on the public purse, but people who are worthy of support and investment. Mothers who know how to resolve difficult problems, considering all sides. Mothers who can handle conflict, who can juggle many balls and who can make tough decisions. Mothers who are as strong as they are nurturing.
The problem with end-of-term school attendance and behaviour awards
As I write, it is the end of the school year in England. Last week, hundreds of schools celebrated the most priviledged of their students. Those priviledged include children who are fortunate enough to have good health, a two-parent family or a single-parent family with lots of local support, a family lucky enough to not live in poverty, a parent with good physical and mental health and children no special educational needs and disabilities. Children lucky enough to tick all of these boxes were treated with special parties, ice creams, certificates, stickers, sweets and other rewards celebrating their ‘good behaviour’ and ‘good attendance’. Not so fortunate children were left to experience yet another day of disappointment, stress and estrangement from their peers.
‘Because I Said So!’ – free book excerpt and introduction to Childism
Childism is no different to any other ‘ism’ – racism, sexism, ageism, heterosexism (more commonly known as homophobia) and ableism. It simply refers to the discrimination of children in our society. You could argue that childism is a form of ageism, since ageism is usually defined as being treated unfairly, or discriminated against, because of age. The term ageism, however, is usually used to refer to the middle-aged and elderly in society and doesn’t address the unique barriers, discrimination and mistreatment faced by the young. Nor does it consider the underlying causes, or the nuanced views necessary to advocate for a societal demographic who are so often believed to be spoiled rotten, showered with constant love, attention and money.
What is Childism? and why should we all be talking about it?
What exactly is Childism?
In short it’s about the discrimination of children in our society. It’s about the fact that child rights should be human rights, and yet children are treated in ways we would never imagine treating an adult.
Sarah Ockwell-Smith 