Category Archives: Tweens

Why Most School Discipline Doesn’t Work

hundreds of thousands of school children are being failed by our current system every day. A system that places the onus on them to change, to behave better, to ironically ‘foster a growth mind-set’. They endure hour upon hour of detentions, loss of golden time, the shame and embarrassment of sitting on the red light, the sad cloud or the warning board. It really doesn’t have to be like this though. Continue reading

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The Three Biggest Mistakes Parents Make When Disciplining Children

It doesn’t matter if you’re an authoritarian parent, hot on punishment and reward, or a gentle parent, focused on connection and empathy. Your kid is going to misbehave. Because that’s what they do….. Continue reading

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How to Praise Your Children in a Gentle and Effective Way

Praise is a controversial topic in Gentle Parenting circles. Many mistakenly think that gentle parents never praise their children and eschew any attempt to show children that we are proud of them. In fact, this is simply not true. Praise can and does form a role in Gentle Parenting, however it looks different to the praise that most people know and use.
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Five Steps to Effective Discipline

Being mindful of neurological development is critical when you discipline. Most mainstream discipline methods – time out, naughty steps, exclusion, shaming and loss of privileges – expect cognitive abilities from children that they just don’t have Continue reading

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Why Common Discipline Methods Don’t Work (and What to do Instead)

most common discipline methods focus on encouraging children to do and be better, so that they are motivated by rewards if they behave ‘well’ and punishments if they misbehave. This would seem sensible, but it makes one huge mistake. Continue reading

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Gentle Parenting – You Mean ‘Hippy, Pushover Parenting’? Busting Ten Gentle Parenting Myths.

…if people ask me to explain gentle parenting in a nutshell I always say the same “treating children how we would like to be treated ourselves”. To this day I don’t understand why it is so controversial, except perhaps that we don’t treat ourselves very well? Continue reading

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Five Reasons why I Hate Elf on the Shelf

Every few years a new parenting ‘must have’ comes along. These toys, sleep props, books and nursery items quickly develop a cult like following. Parents can quickly get sucked in, often feeling left out, or rather worrying that their children are left out if they don’t jump on the trendy train. The truth is children miss out on nothing without an elf. Christmas is no less magical without them. Continue reading

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My Top Toy Recommendations

Most toys inhibit imagination and have a very limited range of play, no wonder that so many parents say “he only plays for a minute or two”. A ‘good’ toy needs to involve an element of control in terms of how a child chooses to play with it, ie: there needs to be more than just one action/motion/use. Ideally it will be gender neutral too. Continue reading

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Children, School Holidays and the Right Level of Entertainment.

I am very much of the school of thought that it is good for children to be bored. When I was a child my parents did very little with me in school holidays, I would ‘play out’ with my friends, make all sorts of concoctions with flowers and mud in our garden, ride my bike and wash it far more often than it needed. Continue reading

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Using Consequences as a Discipline Tool

Consequences can be an effective discipline tool when used mindfully and carefully. Sadly consequences can also be ineffective and even damaging, depending on how and when they are used. There also seems to be a lot of confusion surrounding the use of consequences as a form of discipline. The largest source of confusion seems to be that of the difference between natural and logical consequences, something I hope to clear up in this post. Continue reading

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