As I write, it is the end of the school year in England. Last week, hundreds of schools celebrated the most priviledged of their students. Those priviledged include children who are fortunate enough to have good health, a two-parent family or a single-parent family with lots of local support, a family lucky enough to not live in poverty, a parent with good physical and mental health and children no special educational needs and disabilities. Children lucky enough to tick all of these boxes were treated with special parties, ice creams, certificates, stickers, sweets and other rewards celebrating their ‘good behaviour’ and ‘good attendance’. Not so fortunate children were left to experience yet another day of disappointment, stress and estrangement from their peers.
Author Archives: SarahOckwell-Smith
‘Because I Said So!’ – free book excerpt and introduction to Childism
Childism is no different to any other ‘ism’ – racism, sexism, ageism, heterosexism (more commonly known as homophobia) and ableism. It simply refers to the discrimination of children in our society. You could argue that childism is a form of ageism, since ageism is usually defined as being treated unfairly, or discriminated against, because of age. The term ageism, however, is usually used to refer to the middle-aged and elderly in society and doesn’t address the unique barriers, discrimination and mistreatment faced by the young. Nor does it consider the underlying causes, or the nuanced views necessary to advocate for a societal demographic who are so often believed to be spoiled rotten, showered with constant love, attention and money.
What is Childism? and why should we all be talking about it?
What exactly is Childism?
In short it’s about the discrimination of children in our society. It’s about the fact that child rights should be human rights, and yet children are treated in ways we would never imagine treating an adult.
The top 12 Myths about Gentle Parenting
While there are many mistaken beliefs surrounding gentle parenting, the following twelve are by far the most common and it is incredibly likely you will run into them frequently if you share your plans to parent gently with others. Let’s do some myth-busting!
The Gentle Parenting Stance on Santa/Father Christmas
“What’s the Gentle Parenting stance on Santa (or Father Christmas if you’re in the UK)?” “I’ve heard you’re not allowed to do Santa if you follow Gentle Parenting – is that true?” I think many are confused about Gentle Parenting. It is simply a belief system that children deserve to be treated with respect andContinue reading “The Gentle Parenting Stance on Santa/Father Christmas”
Read the introduction to ‘Beginnings’ for free
I’m delighted to share with you the introduction to my new book ‘Beginnings: A Guide to child psychology and development for parents of 0-5 yr olds’.
The Curse of Growing up a ‘Good Girl’
We often mistake being ‘a good girl’ as a positive thing. So many want their daughters to be ‘good’. But it’s not positive – it is toxic. The pressure and weight of constantly burying your feelings and needs in the pursuit of caring for others eats away at you. It gets so very heavy.
Coping with Parental Burn Out
“I just can’t take any more!”, “I’ve had it up to here with being a parent!”, “I literally don’t have the capacity to handle this”, how many times have you said something similar? Every parent knows how it feels to be emotionally and physically wrung out, exhausted and unable to handle their children. We all know how it feels to be desperate for a break, and by a break I don’t just mean a brief week or two in the sun, but real, tangible time away from the demands of everyday life (including our children!).
What to do when you feel you can’t cope with parenting anymore
It’s not your fault that you lose it at times. It’s not your fault you don’t love every minute of parenting and it’s not your fault that sometimes, you wonder how you’re going to make it through the day. Parenting is bloody hard.
So, what can you do if you’re having a hell of a day (or week – or more)? How do you get through the day when you feel you have nothing more to give? Give these tips a try:
The 7 Golden Rules of Calmer Parenting
1. Everybody can be a calmer parent. It doesn’t take any special personality traits. Privilege does inevitably mean that life is sadly infinitely easier for some, but we can all do some work and make some changes, regardless of our life situations, that will have a positive impact (although I do accept that lack of privileges can and will limit the changes possible)
Sarah Ockwell-Smith 